Last Friday night I was talking to an eighteen year old (God just writing that down makes me feel old) and he was explaining to me that lately he keeps get pied by the opposite sex. I was surprised to hear this, as when I do speak to him he is normally pretty confident when it comes to pulling girls. It made me remember the days when I used to get pied (surprising I know) and also the fact that I did my fair share of pieing too!
When I was single back in the day, there were times when blokes use to ghost me or basically used me to get laid (come on we all have been there, maybe more than once). It’s all part of growing up. Until I settled down with Dave which was nearly three years ago, I was still getting pied until meeting him and vice versa too. There were plenty of times that I thought Dave was going to ghost me too, but that never happened. He clearly knew that I was worth dating (or he is too scared to get rid of me).
Rejection is never nice, no one likes being told “I don’t feel the same way”. That’s a nice way to put it, as most people would just ignore the other person or block them from all social media hoping the person would take the hint. Which to be honest sometimes, some people really don’t get the hint which can get very awkward. I can put my hands up, cringe a bit and admit there has been one or two occasions where I didn’t get the hint, but I felt that I need to have some sort of closure which I did get in the end. I was also a bunny boiler on some occasions when it came to men and looking back now I really needed to be slapped in the face, to make me realise that there was so much forcing on my part. Desperately, I was trying way too hard to find my ‘Prince Charming’.
If I could go back now and talk to the younger version of myself, there would be way too many things I would have to say. First of all do not cut your hair (but that’s another story for another time) stop getting so bloody drunk (you are embarrassing yourself) and last of all stop trying so bloody hard when it come to men, plus you don’t need to use sex to make yourself appealing to blokes.
In total, I have been in seven relationships. Four of them literally lasted like two months, so you couldn’t really class them as relationships. The other two were long term and of course, I’m currently with Dave (which I am also hoping to stick with him, well he has no choice in the matter really). Out of the seven relationships, only two of them I actually found sexually attractive. Not saying the others were or aren’t nice to look at, but if you look at my mental state when I was with the other blokes you can clearly see that I wasn’t doing really well. Not their fault either, there were times that I was a lot to handle but they were far from perfect either.
It seemed like I was trying way too hard to find a boyfriend, when sometimes it was better for me to be on my own and embrace the single life. Sometimes I did, but maybe a bit too much (but a girl should be allowed to have fun, responsibly of course). To be honest I’m not a fan of dating, which is why most of the dates ended up not so well. One time at the end of a date I was given a high five, yes a high five and I ended being with him for like a month or two. You could see why that ended up not lasting very long, plus the communication between us two was pretty poor as well.
It sounds like I received a lot of pies in my life, which clearly makes me look and feel like a loser but what are you going to do? I may of been on the receiving line of many pies, but I also handed out many pies of my own. Sometimes, I wasn’t very nice, I once called someone a stalker and told them to go away ( I was very drunk but doesn’t excuse my behaviour towards that person). There were times where I am actually nice and respectful but one or two blokes clearly didn’t like being told that I wasn’t ready to date. What can I say they also clearly knew that I was a catch…
Getting pied isn’t nice, it can knock your confidence, self esteem, self worth and can make you feel that you will never find someone who wants to be your partner. There were many times, where I use to complain to the girls saying I will never find someone. When I stopped trying too hard to bag myself a man, started to concentrate on myself and enjoy being by myself then I was ready to have someone in my life. To be honest, it is never nice to get pied but it doesn’t mean that you won’t find someone who is right for you in the end.